This is my friend Sameera's post from her myspace blog. it was too good to not share with all of you, and so relevant with my relationshippish thoughts lately.

check her out at:
Sameera on MySpace

Tuesday, February 28, 2006


world of convenience


our generation is one that has become very spoiled. generations before us had a reason or a cause about the things they did . . . for example, many just wanted to get to america for a more successful life, to make money, to have opportunity and they would do whatever it took to get here and to accomplish that. with that move came passion, drive, the commitment to succeed, and the culture. lately, i look around and realize no one wants to work on anything anymore -- a certain complacency has enveloped our generation and for some reason, we're all okay with it. we move from relationship to relationship without any cause or reason, only because it's convenient and available, not because you actually have passion for this person . . . the lines get blurry and all of a sudden the person you're with is just cause for distraction from the one thing you really truly want. because the one thing you want takes work. and work is just not an option. i guess there's a lot about generations before us that makes me nostalgic. true romance along with passion seems to take a backseat to more worldly realistic issues like getting that perfect job or making 100 thousand a year . . . or just being cynical in general. the phrase "i love you" has tumbled out of your mouth so many times at this point you're not even sure you know what it means because didn't you just give that same chant to the person that warmed your bed the night before (i love you, i want to be with you, i love you, i want to be with you)? it all becomes a strange, rhythmic drum line keeping the beat with your heart because it's just so damn comfortable. comfort becomes a dangerous feeling because it keeps you from finding out about yourself, keeps you from the things you want, people you want to get to know, and the things you ultimately want to do.

chivalry is dead. i know that the women in my generation are all about being independent and standing on your own two feet and never looking to anyone else but yourself to be taken care of and that's great. being headstrong and independent are a couple of the traits i believe deeply in, however, no matter who you are or how strong you are, you still deep down want that certain man to come along and sweep you off your feet. that phrase is so antiquated but still speaks so true. i think it goes back to cavemen days when the man is the one that goes out and provides the for his wife and family, or is the one that fights off danger when it's near . . . but i think it's almost instinctive within every woman to want that to some degree. you go out on a date these days and it's up in the air if the girl or the guys pays . . . a few decades ago it would have been a given that the man is taking the girl out. if it's freezing outside you better be sure as hell you're walking out into the parking lot with your man to get the car. little things mean so much. plan a date. open a door. write a sweet note. do the things you did when you were trying to impress one another in the beginning. why should any of that change? if you were motivated to do those things in the beginning, why stop? because you get comfortable? i really believe that if you do those things only in the beginning but not later . . . don't do them at all. it becomes some weird lie, and it's just a letdown. i suppose that's why there's a certain point you reach in a relationship (the 'comfort' phase) where you're thinking "he/she just doesn't do those things anymore." it's sad, it makes you think and frankly you're just disappointed. little things go a long way. it's just a matter or trying.